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Equipping the Saints to Counsel - Lesson 3

by Dr. Ray Self



Self Judgment

Click the play button to begin video lesson and follow along with the class notes below the video window. When you complete this video, click the "Lesson Assignment" button at the bottom of this page to open the lesson assignment.

Self Judgment

1 Peter 3:3-4 - Let not yours be the outward adorning with braiding of hair, decoration of gold, and wearing of fine clothing, but let it be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable jewel of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. (RSV)

We have lived under the false judgments of others and self for so long that we have come to believe that is who we are.

  • We do not see that we are new creations in Christ with limitless possibilities in Him.
  • When we accept false judgments we can lose our destiny.
  • The loss of destiny and purpose leads to a life of frustration and disappointment.

When circumstances change, if a person does not have a strong perception of who he is, then he will change his personality with the ever changing circumstances.

  • Changing externally will not necessarily change the internal.
  • A person becomes who he believes he is. Proverbs 23:7 tells us, “For as he thinks within himself, so he is.”

Everyone lives out of self-perception.

We have been trained and conditioned to be externalists.

  • We try to make ourselves feel better about ourselves by adjusting the outside.
  • God is instructing us to adorn our hearts with Him and His beauty and surrender to Him in order to change the inside.

The question is, “Do you want people to know you for who you are or for how you look and what you do”

  • We must know ourselves for who we are according to God.
  • Our true selves are defined by our hearts.

Beauty - External beauty is not to be rejected; it is just to be put in proper perspective.

Acquiring inner beauty is not a process of acquiring something we do not have.

  • Inner beauty comes by yielding to that which is in us.
  • True beauty and quality can only be found in Jesus.

We need to learn how to look within our hearts and discover the beauty of our true selves.

Satan attacked Jesus’ identity. Matthew 4:3 says, “And when the tempter came to him, he said, If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made bread.”

  • Satan wanted Jesus to prove who He was by works.
  • Jesus knew the source of His identity. Matthew 4:4 - But he answered and said, It is written . . .
  • Jesus knew that what God had spoken was all the proof He needed.
  • What God has spoken is all the proof we need.

Our new nature will produce good works. James 2:17 - So faith by itself, if it has no works, is dead.

When we judge ourselves by performance we will falter when our works do not prove who we are.

  • If works prove our identity then we can exalt our own righteousness!
  • Romans 3:10 says, "There is none righteous, not even one."

Without renewed minds we will still see ourselves the same way we did before we were saved.

Most people are afraid of what they will find within their own hearts.

Our bad perceptions keep the real person of the heart hidden.

  • What most people see in their own heart is a distorted, hidden view of their old nature.
  • This is contrary to the word of God and is not the new creation.

We do not have to become new. We have to get our thinking straight on who we truly are already. Ephesians 4:24 And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.

  • The new man has already been created.
  • We are to put on what has already been given to us.

We are new on the inside.

  • We may think we are not new because of behavioral problems.
  • Behavioral problems result from not understanding our new creation.
  • Behavior is only a symptom. A lack of knowledge is the real problem!

2 Peter 1:3 - . . . seeing that his divine power hath granted unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that called us by his own glory and virtue.

  • Living the godly life comes through knowledge.
  • Knowledge is more than hearing information.
  • True knowledge is when the information is fully retained, remembered, and becomes an active part of us.

2 Corinthians 5:17 - Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

  • When we seek this truth and reality with all of our hearts we will find it.
  • Revelation of the new causes a forgetting of the old.

Behavior modification comes when there is a change of heart, not a change of behavior.

Without a change of heart, destructive behavior will return.

Abstaining form evil is not the ultimate goal. Deliverance from evil is the real goal.

  • Abstinence is just holding on and maintaining even though the desires may still be present.
  • Deliverance is the true freedom that comes when we are changed from the inside out by the Lord.

The Christian counselor can be a powerful instrument of change, but he or she must know how God desires to work in the heart of the counselee.

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