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Prob. 1:28-31. Then will they call upon me, but I will not answer; They will seek me diligently, but they shall not find me: For that they hated knowledge, And did not choose the fear of Jehovah: They would none of my counsel; They despised all my reproof. Therefore shall they eat of the fruit of their own way, And be filled with their own devices.
Proverbs 8:14 Counsel is mine, and sound wisdom: I am understanding; I have strength.
All true counsel comes from the Lord
A counsellor must first stand in the counsel of the Lord
Jeremiah 7:24 But they hearkened not, nor inclined their ear, but walked in the counsels and in the imagination of their evil heart, and went backward, and not forward. Jer. 23:21-22. I sent not these prophets, yet they ran: I spake not unto them, yet they prophesied. But if they had stood in my council, then had they caused my people to hear my words, and had turned them from their evil way, and from the evil of their doings.
The Lord will allow each individual’s fruit to grow according to what the person has planted and cultivated
The promise of Prob. 1:28-31 is “they shall eat the fruit of their own way, and be filled with their own devices”
Jesus said we will know them by their fruit
We are not called to judge but we are called to be observers of fruit
Observation of the fruit of the counselee's light is the key to wisdom for counsel
The Lord will give supernatural insight into all counselling situations but the evidence of the counselee's life will speak volumes
The danger of passing on judgment in the disguise of wisdom is that a counsellor is setting themselves up to be judged (Mat. 7:1)
Judgment is assuming the truth about someone without really knowing the truth
Judgment pretends to know why someone acts the way they do and will quickly label that person accordingly (read Rom. 14:10,13)
When I assume why a person does what they do I have passed a judgment. That is like a doctor who makes a diagnosis without listening. Our predetermined judgments of another person make it impossible to hear what is actually being communicated.
We can become more focused on proving our judgment than being open to the truth
This is a focus on our own need to be right
That is selfish!
Proverbs 18:13 If one gives answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.
Models Not Experts
The best way to help others is to help ourselves
We can develop our lives so we will always manifest the love and heart of God in every situation.
We should become models to follow rather than experts to fix people.
The message of the fixer
The message of the fixer is that you are flawed and unacceptable
You are not fully capable yourself so I must fix you
I am superior
When I seek to fix you I have rejected you.
When people feel we are trying to fix them they will feel controlled and rejected.
Do not impose your choices; help others to be empowered to make their own choices.
People should be inspired by you not controlled by you.
Many believe that teaching what is right is about showing the wrong.
False concept – if people know they are wrong they will automatically do what is right.
Being right does not qualify you to correct others. Being right created battles between other people who also believe they are right.
False concept- I am right therefore I am qualified to help you.
This concept created separation between the “right people” and the “wrong people.”
Our commitment is to model the love of God to others so they can have the real experience of His love for themselves.
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