Counseling Victims to Freedom - Lesson 4
by Dr. Ray Self
Instructions
- Click play button to begin the video.
- Follow along with the study notes below video window.
- When you complete the video, click the "Chapter Assignment" button at the bottom of this page to begin your lesson assignment.
I. First Session
- Let the client talk first; get as much information as you can
- Ask a lot of leading questions
- Example: How did you get that bruise on your arm?
- Watch reactions, body language, expression, tone
- Arms folded, legs wrapped tight, head down, no eye contact; all of these indicate avoidance
- The client could be afraid, wondering what is going to happen
- Fear being discovered
- 3Fear being honest
- Crying too easily or trying to hold back are indicators of shame
- Keep notes, write down key things. God will reveal to you important facts
- Always offer encouragement so they will come back
- Give them prayers to take home
- Save your talking for the end
- Let the client talk again
- Help them to stay focused, especially on themselves
- Offer more encouragement and more information
- You should start seeing some progress
- Find biblical principles and explain them to the counselee
- By this time the real issues should become more evident
- Help your client become more comfortable with talking and desiring help
- Start to teach boundary principles, such as self-definition and self-worth
- Affirm what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior
- Morality and the world is subjective
- Biblical morality is the true morality
- Always open and close with prayer
- Give a homework assignment (i.e. journaling, writing a letter to the abuser)
- Open with prayer
- Discuss the homework
- Counseling tip: If you share your personal testimony keep it short and to the point to keep the focus off of yourself
- Reiterate that Jesus is the answer
- Know your outside resources if a referral is needed
- Leave the door open for further help
- Close with prayer
- Show a lot of love and unconditional acceptance
- Constantly affirm and support
- Know that the Holy Spirit will give you wisdom; “But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him” (James 1:5 NAS)
- Recognize God’s wisdom, “But wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure, then peace loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere”(James 3:17)
- Know that the abnormal can become normal if it is experienced enough
- Many people do not know they are being abused because of the longevity of the attacks
- All truth must be presented in wisdom and love or damage can be the result
- Have faith. “With faith all things are possible”
- There has never been a problem that God does not have a solution for
- “For to us God revealed them through the Spirit; for the Spirit searches all things, even the depths of God. For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man, which is in him? Even so the thoughts of God no one knows except the Spirit of God.” (1 Corinthians 2:10-11)
- If the thoughts of God are revealed through the Spirit, then the responsibility of being led by the Spirit is vital
Study Questions:
- Why do you want to get as much information as you can when counseling a victim of abuse?
- Why is body language important in the counseling session?
- How does the Holy Spirit help in the counseling session?
- All you need to do is tell the victim the truth and they will be free. Yes, no, explain.